Cyrus Broacha, also known as Virus Broacha (sometimes), recently had a chat with the visitors to Rediff.com together with his friend Kunal Vijaykar who directed the movie Fruit n Nut. Both Cyrus & Kunal gave some of the wittiestand very raunchy answers to the questions of their fans. See below:
Cyrus Broacha: Hi, this is Cyrus and Kunal. We are doctors of love and recreation. Fire away!
Cyrusss: The movie 99 was great .. but you were useless in that movie .. any comments?
Cyrus Broacha: Absolutely correct!
Cyrusna: Cyrus, would you consider VJing or acting as your first profession/love??
Cyrus Broacha: My first profession is sleeping.
Lucky: Hey cyrus... I really enjoy the way u talk...gimme some tips how to talk fast in english like u.....
Cyrus Broacha: Lucky, only the first and last words are important. The rest you can mumble. I picked up this from Marlon Brando, India's finest actor.
Dsasa: who is the fruit n who is the nut in the movie ?
Cyrus Broacha: Find out on Friday, October 23 and then let us know!
Admad: Hi "Cyrus The Virus", any chances of you coming back with another season of Bakra?
Cyrus Broacha: Yea, we're hoping to. Perhaps even go to Pakistan next. Apparently we have a good market there.
venkat: Hey Cyrus Which school are you from in Bombay and which year did u pass out from school.
Cyrus Broacha: First twenty years are a blur. Sorry. (Cathedral school -- admission open)
cyrus broacha: cyrus when are you going to learn to speak correct hindi???
Cyrus Broacha: 2016 is my goal. In the meantime, I've done a refresher course called Fruit & Nut, showing October 23rd. He he he.
Sammy: Who do you think is the biggest JERK in the Bollywood?
Cyrus Broacha: That would be me.
Virus broacha: hi cyrus, this is your bro virus. when are you going to participate for Mr. India ? its sad to see such a good looking bloke wasting time..
Cyrus Broacha: I did participate in 1955. I lost in the swimsuit round.
Siddharth: Hi Cyrus & Kunal, I like you both for youur superb comic timing. Kunal, i regularly watch "Foodie" and like the show a lot. Cyrus u were gr8 in 99 and hope that you will be even better in ur forthcoming movie. I wish luck to both of u !!
Cyrus Broacha: Siddharth, enclosed is a cheque for 25 rupees. Thank you for supporting us. More to follow if you watch Fruit and Nut...
virus broacha: who according to you both comic gurus is the baap of comedy in india?
Cyrus Broacha: Mayawati and Mulayam Singh Yadav.
Jinu: Cryus, you will look awesome when u reduce ur weight? your comments??
Cyrus Broacha: Right now, Juni, I'm going in the opposite direction. Otherwise how the hell am I going to get rid of my wife?
philipbkk: i heard u have a wild card entry into Bigg Boss 3, is it true
Cyrus Broacha: This is the lowest moment of my life, to be compared to Rakhi Sawant's mother and Rohit Verma. I would now like to end it all. Goodbye cruel world.
linet: Hey.... linet here (we did Jhalak together) how r u doing? r u planning a sequel to Fruit n Nut. Best wishes for ur movie
Cyrus Broacha: Hi Linet, miss you. We'll ask Kunal.
Kunal Vijaykar: I'm looking for a prequel.
admad: Who is crazier among the two? Kunal or Cyrus?
Kunal Vijaykar: Cyrus, Cyrus, Cyrus.
Cyrus Broacha answers: Kunal is sexier.
vishal: hi cyrus! is fruit and nut similar to 99? and some promos that i have been watching have been great, especially your comic timing in tandem with boman irani:-)))))
Cyrus Broacha: Fruit & Nut is similar to a documentary on the Venus Fly Trap, the only non-vegetarian plant on the planet. It's nothing like 99.
Digant: Hey Cyrus, are you also currently working in some other movies? We would love to see you again !!!
Kunal Vijaykar: We are making Fruit & Nut 1, 2, 3 and 4.
ashu: cyrus do you beleieve in love or arranged marriage?
Cyrus Broacha: I believe in arranged sex and love marriages.
Jinu: Cyrus, How u feel if Kunal is ur partner in next movie?? Any comments??
Cyrus Broacha: As long as he continues to be my love interest, I think the world will be a better place.
Dams: You and Abhishek would have been better for Dostana.
Cyrus Broacha: Abhishek said no.
Princess: Cyrus oh Sighrus, when will we see you and Malaika Arora back on MTV's Loveline? Your inanities and Malaika's deep slit gowns and short dresses, phew, guaranteed to make one burn the midnight oil and hurt one's elbow... Please come back, both of you!
Cyrus Broacha: When MTV hires VJs over the age of 55, we'll be back!
virus broacha: why do both of you go everywhere together? any wrong notions we should have?
Cyrus Broacha: Well, there's three types of sexuality: 1) Hetero 2) Homo 3) Trans We are a fourth kind: 4) A bit like how amoeba make out.
satthemat: who do you think is sexy, Kunal or Rakhi Sawant
Kunal Vijaykar: Mine are bigger!
Cyrus Broacha: I feel Rakhi Sawant's mother is better than both.
ronnie: Kunal. what aws your weight before you entered foodie & what is it now at present?
Kunal Vijaykar: I actually lost about 10 kilos.
varun: hi cyrus how does you wife tolerate you
Cyrus Broacha: Separate bedrooms.
Kunal Vijaykar: Separate holidays.
AchaorbSuryc: You can observe that in the last IIT council meeting was supposed to be on Autonomy of IITs and pay issues related to IIT faculties. HRD Minister Kapil Sibal diveretd media attention by taking JEE eligibility and then again he reversed his decision on the same !!! How to handle such minister by our PM... We request to make some comic on this topic with Kunal.
Cyrus Broacha: The reason why he seems to dislike the IIT culture is because he was rejected by IIT Powai.
gitz: how you manage to loose weight after 99? any tips!!
Cyrus Broacha: I saw the film.
mahesh: Hi due i saw you & kunal at chicken centre usually is this your fav spot since ur colleage days?
Cyrus Broacha: Yes, but please don't tell anyway. If rich people start going there, it'll be ruined.
sanjiv: kunal when i see you having delicacies in foodie i feel like hitting cyrus...tell me why..
Kunal Vijaykar: Why? What does Cyrus have to do with foodie?
satthemat: What if madhur bhandarkar wants to make a Fashion 2? what role do you prefer, a model or a designer
Cyrus Broacha: I don't want to be a model or a designer. I'd like to be the ramp, actually.
pop: Cyrus, I hate you... I want a funniest reply. ??
Cyrus Broacha: Let me guess: Are you my wife, Ayesha?
cyrusdevirus: I read that you are the only Indian to have ever slept in the US White House. How did it feel?
Cyrus Broacha: I just met Bill Clinton. I actually urinated in the same bathroom as him.
vizz_solo: Hi Kunal are you married???
Cyrus Broacha: No. Are you a girl?
chic: Whats the most embarassing thing you have done cyrus
Cyrus Broacha: I got married. Twice.
satthemat: The week that wasn't or the movie that wasn't(read fruit n nut)
Cyrus Broacha: This week, the Fruit & Nut, that was.
Hemchandra: what your opinion about political equation in Mumbai-mah tomorrow?
Cyrus Broacha: Who's going to win? Whoever watches Fruit & Nut.
agentsam: do you believe in scripted comedy?
Cyrus Broacha: Who says we believe in comedy? Maybe some BORROWED scripted comedy.
Kunal Vijaykar: As longs as it gets laughs.
Sudheer: Who are your role models in the field of comedy/humor
Kunal Vijaykar: Mel Brooks, Kishore Kumar.
Cyrus Broacha: My aunt Olga
jjj: Hello cyrus How are you? can u tell me how i want to join bollywood industry and meet priyanka chopra. cyrus can u give some way to meet bollywood stars.
Cyrus Broacha: Go straight to Lokhandwala, take a right at the second signal, and then... oh god... then you'll have to ask the Rickshaw walla.
Stan: Man . .how can you be funny all the time . .!! amazing talent!
Cyrus Broacha: There's one time when I can't be funny. It's called orgasm.
rajguru: what would you do if you are no vjing
Cyrus Broacha: Go back to Ajay-ing. I'm actually an LLB.
Radhakrishna: Hey, Cyrus. If u r married, share ur tips on how to retain to be humor after marriage.
Cyrus Broacha: Only one option: stay with your mother. And if that doesn't work, stay with my mother.
lk: you should really do stand up comedy...like HBO specials..and do one in Bangalore
Cyrus Broacha: I'm free for the next two hundred days.
cbj: Your comedy is mediocre at best. You pale in comparison to the greats like Carlin, Hicks and Pryor. Why dont you aim higher?
Cyrus Broacha: Sorry. Poor genetics. Nothing can be done. Nothing like Richard Pryor.
kiran: Kunal and Cyrus, whats common between fruit, nut and sex??
Kunal Vijaykar: You need two nuts to have sex.
Cyrus Broacha: And if the nuts are of the same breed, then they're fruits!
virus bro: cyrus, virus here again...please answer me naa.... do u like russell peters?
Cyrus Broacha: Not in that way. Not in the biblically sense. Okay... maybe.
agentsam: if comedy fails, what will you next turn to ?
Cyrus Broacha: The circus.
Kunal Vijaykar: Another film. That seems to be the way it happens in Bollywood.
virus bro: kunal, u small little egg...u will make a movie??
Kunal Vijaykar: I'm the egg, you're the chicken. I came first!
shyam: wht u will do to improve taste of indian comedy flicks
Cyrus Broacha: Play them on radio.
chic: You both rock in comedy all the best for movie..
Cyrus Broacha: Thank you. Remember to check out Fruit & Nut. I hate to keep repeating myself, but don't miss Fruit & Nut. Seriously, did I mention Fruit & Nut? You know what? What the hell... Go see Blue!
Cyrus Broacha says, Alright everyone, it was fun. To the one person who supported us: Thank you. To the rest, thank you even more!
Kunal Vijaykar answers: Thank you everyone for your support. Bye guys!